Just as I was folding towels today God gave my heart a little present. I want to ALWAYS be happy that Magdalena is with her Jesus never to suffer the sins of this world, but when I am not happy it doesn't mean that I am sad. It has taken me some time to realize this emotion because I get a guilty feeling for sometimes lacking the excitement of what she must be doing right now in God's presence. (I always imagine her with a pink tutu on dancing as a way of worship.) But shouldn't I be homesick because feel odd to be in this world? If I am too comfortable maybe I am being too worldly. This life is so short, and we never know how short. Shouldn't I be more outspoken, more demanding that my time be Christ-centered?
This Mercy Me song came on that gave me the correct adjective. I am homesick, and I will be praying that my life will become more Christ-centered so that I am even more homesick. By Jesus Magdalena and I are able to meet again, and on days like her birthday, death day, and other holidays those feelings of being homesick are only magnified.
Thank you so much for your many prayers, and it helped lift the weight off of my heavy heart. Please listen to the song if you have a moment....it is beautiful.