This summer has been an excellent time of relaxation for me. I have been able to keep up my house better, make Noah's lunch, go to the pool, etc. My professors for my last classes, which were in the spring, in the master's program did give me extra time to finish my work because I had gotten so distracted with Magdalena's news in April, and I just needed the time to deal with it. I lack only the final project of one class now, but doing that type of work is not stressful to me. Being able to keep the stress level low for school helped me to get it done, finish well, and still learn. Without the kindness of the university and professors, I can't say that I wouldn't have just given up at that point. I can't wait to see how God is going to use me having that degree because I have learned so much from it.
So I was enjoying a hot summer day last week driving while sipping on a cold, cherry diet coke when I heard a song that got my attention. It was Natalie Merchant's "Wonder". I don't know a lot about Natalie Merchant's beliefs or personal life or what her meaning of the song was, but I do know that God used it as a reminder to me. I write a lot about preparing for Magdalena's death and celebrating her small life because the odds of her surviving beyond her first year are less than 5%. I believe that God can work miracles, just as can be seen in the life of Annabel Grace who is three years old living with Trisomy 18 http://annabelgrace.blogspot.com/. However, I do want to be realistic of the huge possibility that God may choose her to come home early, and this is where the hope is. Her life was not meaningless, but full of wonder because she is a creation of God, and it is truly a miracle that she has continued to live this long when about 50% of Trisomy 18 babies don't. It is sad to me that many women and doctors don't recognize a Trisomy 18 baby as one of God's sweet blessings and creations, and they agree with terminating the pregnancy early. As I feel her kicking inside me now (she must know that I am writing about her), I just cannot imagine losing her before God's timing.
It is not only a disease like Trisomy 18, Edward's Syndrome, that takes the life of little babies. Let us not assume that "this would never happen to me or my friends" but allow us continue to pray for the women who are pregnant and their children's safe delivery into the world; yet, at the same time let us not see hopelessness if a baby does not arrive safely into this world. Let us be reminded that God's hand is in all things, and he is our main comfort and support. God uses even the tiniest wonders to praise His name.