Sunday, March 22, 2009
I am not sure how much I have written about Noah, but I hope that I have given you a true image of the wonderful man he is. Although we have been married what some consider to be a short period of time, he is so good about reading me, especially since Magdalena passed away. Without words he knows when I want/able to explain her situation to someone we just met or not. Just today we met two new separate people at church. The first one asked if we had children, and we explained Magdalena's situation, and although the opportunity opened up with the second person to discuss Magdalena, I just couldn't do it again. And Noah could just tell not to bring it up. When Magdalena passed we had so much equipment here that belonged to her, oxygen, feeding pump, tubes, syringes, and so much more. It crowded our little home at first, and then, it became part of the decor. Without me knowing he took it all over to our hospice nurse, knowing it would be difficult to wait for it to be picked up by whomever was responsible, and then, have to watch it go. I wouldn't have been a strong person, and Noah just took care of it for me. Then, just a few days ago a letter came for Noah in the mail from the funeral home. Thinking that it was just a bill, I left it for him to open, and later I was going to look at it, but he stopped me. Just saying "Julie, don't open that." I know what's in that envelope, but I can't say that I want to look at it just, yet. It is the closure to all of her life, her death certificate. I will just tuck that envelope away until we need that piece of paper, but I don't want to look at it. He is right. He knew and just wanted to protect me. And now that I am pregnant again he continues to take care of me in a way that brings us even closer together because it is not just physical tiredness that wears me down but emotional from missing Magdalena and all of the fears for our new baby. He is an amazing man, my protector.