Sunday, March 22, 2009

My Protector

I am not sure how much I have written about Noah, but I hope that I have given you a true image of the wonderful man he is. Although we have been married what some consider to be a short period of time, he is so good about reading me, especially since Magdalena passed away. Without words he knows when I want/able to explain her situation to someone we just met or not. Just today we met two new separate people at church. The first one asked if we had children, and we explained Magdalena's situation, and although the opportunity opened up with the second person to discuss Magdalena, I just couldn't do it again. And Noah could just tell not to bring it up. When Magdalena passed we had so much equipment here that belonged to her, oxygen, feeding pump, tubes, syringes, and so much more. It crowded our little home at first, and then, it became part of the decor. Without me knowing he took it all over to our hospice nurse, knowing it would be difficult to wait for it to be picked up by whomever was responsible, and then, have to watch it go. I wouldn't have been a strong person, and Noah just took care of it for me. Then, just a few days ago a letter came for Noah in the mail from the funeral home. Thinking that it was just a bill, I left it for him to open, and later I was going to look at it, but he stopped me. Just saying "Julie, don't open that." I know what's in that envelope, but I can't say that I want to look at it just, yet. It is the closure to all of her life, her death certificate. I will just tuck that envelope away until we need that piece of paper, but I don't want to look at it. He is right. He knew and just wanted to protect me. And now that I am pregnant again he continues to take care of me in a way that brings us even closer together because it is not just physical tiredness that wears me down but emotional from missing Magdalena and all of the fears for our new baby. He is an amazing man, my protector.

18 comments:

  1. I am so glad to hear you have a perfect match to journey this hard road with. God bless you both.

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  2. What a wonderful man you have. It is always nice to have someone to lean on in your weekest moments but even better when that person is your spouse. Continuing to pray for your family.

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  3. Hey Julie,
    My heart hurts for you. Reading your blog helps me, because it is nice to know that I am not the only one with these same feelings. I lost my Allie to T18 just a few days after Magdelena, and I received her certificate yesterday. Unfortunately, I opened it before my husband, and it was extremely difficult. So thank your sweet hubby for taking care of you. Thank you for sharing.

    Susan Brewer
    alliesparents@gmail.com

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  4. What a wonderful man you are blessed with.; Know that you are very special and tht Magdalena and her siblings will be very blessed to have Noah as their father

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  5. Christy9:40 PM

    Good job, Noah! I hope that you both are finding some peace in this chaotic time.

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  6. What an awesome God we have to give your Christ-centered husband such wisdom to protect you and love you...Julie, you and Noah and Magdalena have blessed my heart so much....I'm praying for you everyday....He is our Rock, our Strength, our Comforter, our Redeemer....leading us minute by minute....What a testimony you all have to God's glory. Delane

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  7. Anonymous9:28 AM

    Noah and Julie-It is so difficult to read your story because I too lost my precious baby girl, Jada Michal, to Trisomy 18 in July 2009. Nonetheless, your sincere love and dedication to your beautiful baby is heart warming. Like you, my husband and I were determined to make each moment with our daughter happy, beautiful, and full of peace. We have already been so blessed to call these babies "ours" however I pray that the Creator wrap you in His comfort, grace, and mercy and blesses you eternally. In the spirit of our daughters, Magdalena Grace and Jada Michal...Tori

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  8. Anonymous9:33 AM

    In my last comment, I mistakenly wrote that my daughter passed in July 2009...I meant July 2008. Also, please feel free to contact me at latoriya_phillips@yahoo.com.

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  9. Julie I am so thankful that God brought you and Noah together. May HE continue to bless you and you all.

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  10. what a sweet note. God makes such perfect matches!!!

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  11. Praise God for the blessing that Noah is to you! Isn't it amazing how He knew exactly what/who you would need in a godly husband before you even got to this point in your lives. He is good, and truly is the giver of all good gifts!

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  12. I'm thankful that you have Noah. It's wonderful the many ways that marriage is a blessing and help and comfort on the road to glory!

    How far along are you? Do you have a due date?

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  13. That is so beautiful. I only hope I have that too when I get married.

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  14. Noah and Julie,

    We are Aaron and Laura Dees of Pearl, MS. We saw your story on the Clarion Ledger website this morning and were touched by it very much. We also just recently lost our daughter as well. Ella Cate Dees was born May 1, 2008 and much to our surprise, she was born with 3 different heart conditions. God allowed us to have our baby for 10 weeks and then she went to be with the Father on July 10, 2008.

    The past 8 months have been very tough for us as I know you can identify. It is strange, yet comforting, to read some of your feelings and thoughts as they are some of the very same feelings and thoughts that we deal with on a daily basis. We have recently teamed up with the American Heart Association to do programs similar to what you are doing with the March for Babies. As that is for you, this is a way for us to honor our sweet Ella.

    Thank you for sharing your story for many different reasons...Our family will pray for yours as you continue to heal.

    God Bless,
    Aaron and Laura Dees
    alcehd14@bellsouth.net

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  15. Isn't God good in how He plans every step of our way, including and especially in our mate? I'm thankful that he gave you and Noah to each other...

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  16. Isn't God good in how He plans every step of our way, including and especially in our mate? I'm thankful that he gave you and Noah to each other...

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  17. Anonymous9:29 AM

    Isn't it beautiful how God brings together just the right people?! Have a blessed day. Enjoy this pregnancy as much as you can. Little M will watch over you every step of the way.

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  18. You two are so blessed to have each other. What sweet tenderness you share.

    Magdalena is blessed to call you Mom and Dad and this new little one also.

    Prayers continue as you hearts heal and prepare for you second child.
    Love,
    Kathy

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