O Love That Will Not Let Me Go

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The wives of seminary students have the privilege of taking classes for a grade or auditing them for free. Since Noah has been in school, we have not had the time for me to do this, but this semester we are "taking" a class together, our first class. Noah is completely focused on it because he will be taking the tests and writing the papers, but I get to enjoy the fun part of it. We have an incredible seasoned professor who is teaching a class on the life and works of C.S. Lewis. One of the assignments of the class is to read 800 pages of his works. Unfortunately, the option does not include the Narnia series, but I have just completed my first book of the list, The Screwtape Letters . I was so happy to begin with this one because it was intense because it was so personal. The novel is written in the form of letters between two devils in which the uncle is trying to train his young nephew on how to truly win a person for their side. It goes through all of the little t...

The wives of seminary students have the privilege of taking classes for a grade or auditing them for free. Since Noah has been in school, we have not had the time for me to do this, but this semester we are "taking" a class together, our first class. Noah is completely focused on it because he will be taking the tests and writing the papers, but I get to enjoy the fun part of it. We have an incredible seasoned professor who is teaching a class on the life and works of C.S. Lewis. One of the assignments of the class is to read 800 pages of his works. Unfortunately, the option does not include the Narnia series, but I have just completed my first book of the list, The Screwtape Letters . I was so happy to begin with this one because it was intense because it was so personal. The novel is written in the form of letters between two devils in which the uncle is trying to train his young nephew on how to truly win a person for their side. It goes through all of the little t...

It is hard for me to believe that my little man is approaching his first birthday, and it is happening so quickly. Every day he does something new and different, and with each milestone it reminds me of how happy I am that I work from home. It makes squeezing the life out of a penny worthwhile. Every day is an adventure for him, and his smile is a contagious one! Slowly we have been introducing new foods, which is hard for me because I am so fearful that he will choke. Before Magdalena was born I took the CPR and choking classes, but I really don't want to ever have to use that information! So with every new step, I am hesitant, but then, he does it with such ease as to say "see mommy, I can do it!". My neighbor will probably laugh when she reads this story because they experienced this nervousness first hand. I have decided to take a night class with Noah. Our neighbor has an older daughter who watched Walt the first night that this class took place. They have ...

This was a beautiful chapter to me because so often in the midst of suffering or hurting my heart doesn't feel God's love. I feel so far from it, but we are reminded through scripture that God's love is not a "sentimental feeling nor is it circumstantial. It is an inner confidence in his loving intentions that gives us the security and strength we need for enduring the difficulties of this life." We gain this confidence through studying and memorizing scripture so that when the storm hits and our feelings tell us God is not here, our mind is reminded of what He has told us and done for us through His love. God demonstrates His own love for us in this; While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. -Romans 5:8 "There is an enemy who seeks to destroy you", and the lowest points in life is when the enemy, Satan, tries to knock you down farther. Rest peacefully knowing that "You are engraved on the palms of his (God's) hands - never off of his...

Through my writings, the sufferings of a mother who has lost a child is revealed, and at times this suffering has been so overwhelming that I have forgotten that there are those hurting around me. I think that is the fog that hovers over a person, Satan attacking them at their weakest point and then, with much prayer the sun pierces through again. And now, as I awaken from my fog I am shocked at what I have missed. For the past few years, I have been so consumed with my situation that I have forgotten to recognize the suffering that came on this day 9 years ago when lives were taken out of hatred. I remember exactly where I was when it happened, and how I went to my accounting class (I can remember exactly where I was sitting.), and the professor sent us home to watch the news. Noah and I are sitting here watching the news as though we are with the people in New York. So many lives were lost. Every individual in this country has been affected and continues to be by the events of that d...

Within a week I had so many special reminders of Magdalena's impact on others. Her memory alone is special, but when small things occur that let me know God is still using her life to change this world, my heart is warmed, a God-provided comfort. The first came a surprise. In a brown envelope was this March of Dimes pin. I will never wear it, and the pin itself is worthless except of what it signifies. To me this pin represents all of the people that Magdalena has mobilized to help babies have a fighting chance at life. It wasn't just one person that gave a full amount but a lot of people together giving small amounts (and buying t-shirts!) to help raise money for babies. Because special babies require special care. I stared at the pin for awhile through teary eyes just thinking how proud I was of her! That amazing little girl. No, it doesn't stop there. A few days later I received a thank-you note in the mail from the children's hospital thanking us for the t...